Friday, May 25, 2007

Burning Engine, and Alonso thinks his car is still the best.

Can you imagine how frustrated you can get when your comments are not taken into consideration, ended up everything turned into mess?
I was working in a project which the project timeline is quite tight. I have to learn up something totally new in 3 weeks time and get the real work done in 1 month. Before all these started, I checked with Alonso on some issues, where his reply was, if we work based on what you said, we'll not able to get things done. My way is much much faster. He couldnt answer what I was asking, I believe he couldn't get what I mean.
Later on, after learn up his framework, I started to work on the system. And guess what happened? .. the extra and very important component is not able to work on the so-called best framework. oh.. no no no.. it can works on the best-framework, only thing that you have to do extra works. We do not have time for that already.
One thing I really want to tell my Alonso on his face, "PLEASE make sure you know and consider everything before you tell me your framework is the best in the work. ". And stop telling me "I want to bring xxx up, I want to bring you up. I'll make sure you learn up bla bla bla by the end of the project". Well, you are one of the lousiest communicator I've ever met. My previous Slow-and-soft Alonso is far better. My prev-previous shit-shit-super-arrogant Alonso is much better.
I am so so so so frustrated, for not able to complete my works and still have to work with my Alonso for the remaining of this project (at least 8 more months) without showing my frustration. sighhhhhh...

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Alonso Roars

Based on the brief introduction of Alonso and the post on Alonso and his car, one might get the impression that Alonso is meek and gullible. Perhaps I am terrible at judging people. People used to repeat, never judge a book by it's cover. In my case, I guess I wouldn't be able to judge the book even after I see beneath it's cover.

Funny thing about Alonso is whenever he was asked a question, he will pause for some time and usually quite a long time before giving any reaction. Maybe he is trying to give people the impression that he is putting his thinking hat on. But it succeeded more in annoying people because sometimes people only expect a short "Yes" or "No" reply and while Alonso is taking his own sweet time to put on his thinking hat. People start to wonder whether Alonso is putting on the "right" hat on.

So, Alonso completed his task. Despite taking longer and having more resources to get the job done, Alonso complains that he doesn't get enough credits. Alonso demands that Ronnie, Alonso's boss, gave him a better score. Alonso refused to accept the score and when Ronnie turned down Alonso's plea, Alonso called for a press conference to vent his frustration to the public on how unfairly he was treated.

Now, someone who is meek would not go through such trouble just to obtain a better score. Of course being Alonso, it never crosses his mind whether he deserved a better score in the first place.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Get your superior to back you up.

Two days after my conversation with Alonso that was obviously FAILED, I talked to my project manager trying to show him what are the things that I'm working on.
PM showed me a rather weird look, thinking that he couldn't understand what i'm talking about, I tried to explain him again.. (at the same time have the "failed" word in my mind for the reason I couldnt explain well). I said, "sometimes I think there is a major problem with my explaination skill, or else why Alonso can't understand me? but very weird oh, my friends can understand me..I also dont know why la...sigh...". mana tau, PM said, not only you.. I have problem with my explaination also.
ah?? @_@... how come? he continued, Alonso can't understand me. No matter how plain, how easy is my explaination. He just cant get it. He can't understand.
O-o.... I think we got an answer to our problems. It's the problem with Alonso, not us, not me.

I am still having problems communicating with Alonso, but the best thing is, I have PM to back me up in this. It's not me who do not want to get things done fast, it's because of problem with another side who couldn't understand language. hehehe.. it's good to have someone to back you up in this situation huh..

Friday, May 18, 2007

Car Cannot Start

Alonso is all geared up for the weekend. He got into his car and tries to start the engine. After a few tries, the car still would not start and Alonso is getting frustrated. He tried again and again.. and again.

Alonso turned to me and ask whether I could help him find out why the car refused to start. He looked puzzled and he told me that the car was functioning well yesterday. He did not make any changes or adjustment to the car but the car just refused to start. I could sense his frustration as he continue saying, "Swear the car was fine yesterday. Same car. Nothing has been changed." He goes on and on stressing that it was the very same car he drove yesterday.

I took a peak at his car and told him that the fuel indicator is on and the car probably would not start because it ran out of petrol. The car works fine after he filled up on fuel.

You see, Alonso is clueless most of the time about almost everything. He would not have the initiative to check for the cause of the problem. He will continue doing what he does and hope that after a few tries, everything would go back to normal. Recently he told me he needs to change the car's tyres. I asked whether it's front or rear tyres. He replied, "I think it's front but can always change the rear tyre if it is easier".

How good is your explaination skills?

Let me continue with my Alonso's stories that made me go wah-biang. So I couldnt commnicate with my Alonso, no ym, no phone.. can only talk face to face.
But how can I meet him up all the time? So I show what I want in Microsoft Word, table format. Do a screen shot and sent him the file. Then I told him, well, those information on the picture are something that I want to show. How do I do it?
I've never experience such kind of *shock* when I received his answer. He said:So those data in the tables are things that you want to show? I said, yeah, can you show me how to do that? He said:You already showing everything in the table and you still said you don't know how to do it?
WAH-BIAAAANG--very gao-lat one.. I almost fainted in my office. Sigh.. I think must be my fault for not telling him that "this is some dummy data that I created in MICROSOFT WORD, to show dummy and explain to him since the dummy can't understand language"..
Must be problem with my explaination skill, or else I wont face this kind of communication problem.

my Gym Alonso - Part 2

continuation from Part 1...

So with nowhere to run.. I opened the door and walked out of the washroom (praying ardently and hope its a Mistake.. >< ) ..only to see my Gym Alonso ... Aih~!! Really Soi!! (Rough translation : unlucky/unfortunate)

So I just stand there, exploring my Options :-|
1. Shall I just packed up and walked away? Err..that would be rude loh.. :\
2. or Perhaps pick up my cell fon and called my frens and warn to stay away b4 its too late? BUT meaning leaving me along to face Alonso~ err, dun wan leehhh....

As I was still figuring it out, my 1st fren sauntered in .. I stared at her meaningly as she walked in, and so she took a glanced at the stage.. stood there in shock and proceed to trudge towards me limply.. Hahaha!! Her expression is one of resignation and dismay. *Hilarious!*
As we were about to discuss about what to do, Alonso called the class together and proceed to start promptly thus cutting of any more of our discussion...

By then my 2nd friend walked in energetically and seeing the look frustration on our faces (and me shaking my head vigorously) she turned and took a looked at the stage, and then walked towards me whilst grumbling and mumbling .."WHY didn't u sms and tell me.. I would have drove all the way home.. WhY??? " >_<" Ahahaha..~ I could only grinned to her sheepishly is response ...
At the same time, I couldn't resist laughing when she grudgingly took her place and follow the instructions half-heartedly and limply. :P

OK. By now, YoU; the readers are probably thinkin WHY on earth we hated Alonso so. "WE" in this sense means majority of the gym members (I've yet to come across anyone that thought otherwise). Alonso would always greet you in this really high-pitched and superficially friendly manner every time she came across you and exclaimed :
" Hi!! XXXX, long time no see!! How come u don't come to gym? How come so long? Aiyo, you should..else gt Fat woh.. If u do it everyday u can Look like me!! ..... bla bla bla bla ...stop n take breath and ...bla bla bla bla bla...etc etc etc"

Although Alonso would proudly proclaims to anyone within ear shot that she only has a wee body fat% of 23% which by no means is a easy feat. Taking 1 look at her physique.. -.-" skinny as a African Monkey and her curves is as good as my local Airport tarmac .. in another word F-L-A-T !

I can't help but to think - Heck~! No way I am going to Looked like her lah.. body fat or not~ I still wan to have a body statistics of X:Y:Z (i.e: curveous) . NOT X:X:X (=curve-less) like her. NO-Thank-You! =_=*

The annoying about her is she tends to rattled on non-stop, dished out one comments after another to you regardless on your response/opinion. Even if you can tear away from her, she would still call out in her loud voice and make u listen to her 'advices'!

Wah piang eh~, she dunno when to stop wan~ >_<* plus.. I would like to tell her :
"Hey Buddy.. I not that fren with you lehh, no need for you to be so 'friendly' to me hor.. "
Nuff said, her advices is not always taken kindly by those that she came across to. U_U Its not hard to see Why..

OK, another thing about Alonso is she's originally the gym instructor and caretaker. But for some reason (lack of instructors?), the owner got her to take over some of the Aerobic classes, In which she took up the challenge pretty enthusiastically.. and proceed Fails Miserably .. *Snickers*

After some of her earlier classes, no ONE bothers to turn up to her classes afterwards (perhaps some poor clueless 1st timer :P).. the reason behind this is she is totally clueless on how to lead a group fitness class.
What a good instructor would do usually is to wear a Mic if you are soft spoken or else your voice can't be heard over the loud techno music used during class.. and to GIVE instructions that your participants can follow...
...however Alonso obviously doesn't realise that..

She would simple go full force and move n prance on the stage herself, whilst everyone just stand there and gawd at her. U see hor, she dun wait for u to get her rhythm at all..or even make sure that u follow her wan. No clear instruction..nothing.. She's like this runaway car .. turning into corner or making U-turn without using the signal/indications. At times that she does gave instruction, she changed her rhythm liao; after u turn left then gave the signal..what for liao? People over-shoot liao WAT~?! @.@

Really NO-LAW one O.o" Most of us after a few attempts would just stand there and stare at her in disgust...before grudgingly procedding the steps. I can rattle on and on with her 'misdemeanor', but nuff said.

Anyway, we all decided to stay on and bear the grueling session with Alonso. It didn't turn out too bad because we vent all our frustration with each of the steps and had a few good laughs along the way. Looking at each other's attics and the looks of utter frustration on our face had us in laughing in stitches at some point. All in all, the torturing session by Alonso was lightened and made fun with the presence of my good friends.

Towards the end.. we had a great time sweating out because of Alonso, had lotsa laughs together (on the expenses of Alonso also :P) .. and bust both the Calories and Stresses accumulated throughout the day .. all thank to the Unfortunate meeting with our Gym Alonso!!

And I've come to the conclusion that, it doesn't matter how bad the situation is.. as long as you have your Good Friends with you to Laugh together, no circumstances is too unbearable!
Cheers to my Frens~!! 'Or@nge & Rolver'. Thanks Girls, for being my precious frens! ^.^
((( HUGSS!!! )))

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Alonso said "I don't get you"

well my Alonso is someone in my workplace. I just couldnt believe that I will get 1 Alonso after another. let alone those previous Alonso(hehe.. I'll cover it next time.. this thing cannot be too rush one ba...), I must hightlight my current Alonso, which I think is probably the worst.
My Alonso is my colleague. Due to some arrangement in the recruitment process, he is based in Northern region (I'm in KL). We are working on the same project, so our daily communications (I really hope i dun need to talk with him *daily*) is done through YM.

Few days back, I tried to asked him something via YM. I have a list of Product A,B,C,D in page. I want to view product details of Product B. How do I do that using JSF? It's a very simple question in programming world(ah.. ok ok..i'm dumb la.. still hvnt figure out how to do it). Guess what his answer? "I dont get you" .. HUH!!???!!! he couldn't get me!
I tried to explain to him, STEP BY STEP. Ok, I go in to page A, see products A B C D. then each product has Name, and Description. Name there got URL link, I click at the link, the page will show me the product details of the one that I clicked. So for me to get the product details, I have to pass in the product ID to the backend codes to get the SQL. But how to I pass in the ID? Guess what is his reply? "I dont get you"..then..."Oh..that depends on how you want to view your product details, can be in DIV, can be in another .jsp page, can be in frame"... wah biang!! of course I know all those. What I want is just "how do I pass in the ID" and how do the backend code gets the ID. sigh... ok.. maybe you will say "why dont talk to him via phone". I did. We couldnt communicate via YM, so we talked in phone. And those are the replies I got.

Alonso is a very good programmer, really good technically. He's the team leader of the project that I'm working on, but too bad he is a bad project manager(luckily he's not). A face-to-face communication can always bring me some results(still need to do lengthy explaination before he get it la..), but definitely not via YM or phone.
The worst part is, this is just the beginning of the project...

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

my Gym Alonso~

At my first post, I was feeling pretty smug with myself because I can only think of only one , a workplace Alonso. So that means I'm surrounded by pretty nice people that doesn't warrant the 'honour' of being call an Alonso.. Right!? *^.^*

Sadly, I couldn't have been more wrong~ V.V In less than an hour after I post that up, I realise I have another Alonso that I missed out.. one that I dreaded to even approach or to even have any interaction with.. my Gym Alonso!!!

Ok, so the story goes like this. I would usually go to this gym/aerobic sessions at a ladies-only fitness club straight after work (530pm). I'm joined by 2 of my close friends cum colleague. So today we had a date, that all 3 of us would join the 530 session of Steps; which in a nutshell is a high intensity workout involving using a Reebok Step, which basically is VERY Syiok one. Sure sweat like a dog (somehow that doesn't sound too compelling.. hmm O.o) OK, Anyway~

So we rushed to that class straight after (actually we slip out a few mins b4 530 =P) and while 1 of my friend are getting changed, I went up to the aerobic studio and start 'booking' our location. Its a fairly popular class among the members as its taught by the very athletic and shapy lady who own the place (I guess that is a motivation for all of us, to strive and look like her! =P), thus the studio gets very packed most of the time.

As I were early (extremely RARE!), I manage to secure 3 premium space for me and my 2 friends. Very Smug with my accomplishment I decided to go and get changed myself in the washroom within the studio. . So while I was happily changing into my gym outfit, I thought I heard a familiar voice from the studio. . O.O" .. I literally froze and thought...
OMG!! Its can't be her!! And she was announcing that the original instructor can't make it and she is taking over the class. Imagine my horrors, I have no place to escape!

In the normal circumstance when we were late, we would just take a peek through the glass door and run for our lives if she were instructing. And there I was, IN the class.. and had reserved not ONE.. but THREE spots. There is no way I can escape without being noticed. =.="
So I had no choice but ....

== the tales of the encounter with Gym Alonso continues ... Pls stay tune.. ==

Tribute to Alonso

I agree with Watermelon, we need a blog; dedicated to the Alonsos' of our lifes. =)
Some of us who are lucky(or with a temperament of an angel) may have none, or maybe just One... some of us who are not as fortunate; may have > 1 .. O.o"

Alonso sometimes can be a de-stressing factor, giving you that much needed laugh or even some cheeky behind-his/her-back-snickers >=] But more often than not, they can prove to be a walking disaster, waiting to tick off that long-dormant-volcano in you.

So stay tune for more amusing stories and tales to the amazing adventures (and also Mis-adventures) of our Alonsos~ ^.*


Disclaimers:
The authors have nothing against the F1 - Alonso though.. so for those die-hard Alonso fan out there.. no offense meant. Don't go and whip out your weapons just yet ok.. >.<" lol~

Who is Alonso

Alonso is someone close to us. The things that Alonso does, regardless how small never cease to amuse us. Of course, the amused feeling usually comes after counting from 10 to 1. In most situations, we tried putting ourselves in Alonso's shoes but much later, we found out that most of the time Alonso is not wearing any shoes. So this is our tribute to Alonso and all Alonso alike we have come across in our humble life.

About Alonso

A blog dedicated to Alonso. :)